The emotional woman

 This post goes out to my fab housemate for introducing me to the guilty feminist and genuinely just putting up with me!

I am a feminist but… I regularly want to wear Victoria Secret model like costumes and strut down the street to feel fabulous and make everyone look at me.

I am a feminist but…I fear using power tools, because I think I am going to slice my arm off. But, I will shout at anyone who will tell me I can’t use one or offer to help. Thus, big jobs won't get done…it is not helpful.

I am a feminist and I am fed up of being treated differently.

 Now this next bit may sound a bit Emma Watson, but it is so true…

I have a great passion for gender equality. We may think our society is equal but it is not.

When I was at school I was asked if I was on steroids because I use to be able to beat the boys in races. They could not accept that I simply trained hard at the sport I competed in.

I regular hear of men who have had to deal with server mental health issues and have even committed suicide because they have found it difficult to speak out, or think it is un masculine to speak out about their feelings.

One of my closest female friends was severally bullied for being incredibly clever and good at maths, but the boys were not.

People do not believe me when I say I am training to be a vicar. The most common response is-'but your not an old man'. It is great they notice I am a woman!

We put stereotypes on what each gender should be doing, or how much they should be paid and on the way they are treated.

I am stereotyped as I am considered too emotional, because I am a woman. 

Or more precisely.

'You cry too much and your female emotions get in the way of your decisions'.

As a result of this I then I decided I was going to use all my will power not to cry in front of anyone. Realistically this decision did not last long. I'm a cryer, a messy blubbering cryer and waterproof mascara is my best friend.

The thought of me having some form of Bridget Jones sniffling breakdown may sound humorous, but in reality being told your too emotional hurt me so much. I felt a lone and like I could not ask for help, because my feelings where unnecessary, over the top or got in the way. 

After listening to the guilty feminist (which I encourage you to listen to) and many kind encouraging words from others, I realised that my emotion is a gift. Whilst I understand there is a time to cry and there is a time for everything, I want to reassure people that I can control my emotion, but when I am in a safe place and I need to let it out, I will. 

I have learn't a lot from listening to #guiltfempod that has made me feel even prouder to be me. I worry a lot about my actions, the way people respond to me, the way people talk to me or about me. The guilty feminist helped me realise that all these things I worry about are 100% normal and I am not on my own. 

I will probably always be 'too emotional', but I am learning how to control that emotion appropriately. I am glad that I can cry and feel able to speak about how I feel, because so many people cannot. I am also incredibly proud to be a woman who is surrounded by amazing women who constantly encourage me to be me. The Steph God made me to be!  

I am a feminist and a Christian and I have emotion and I do not feel I need to apologies for it! But, I probably will.

Be Blessed,

Steph

Xoxo

P.S if you ever need a good cry, I can be a shoulder to cry on, because I have cried an awful lot in my life. Thanks to everyone who as loved me through my tears!

#guiltyfeminist #feminism #emotion #christian