This one time I went to India : Volume 3

Tonight has given me a rare opportunity in India for some quiet time. No where I have been in India has been quiet. As I have said before car horns should be the soundtrack to India, or at least Indian cities. Nevertheless, in this incredible bustling country I am so thankful for a quiet evening on my own to reflect on the past 10 days. 

So here goes, tonight’s quiet reflections. 

1. God is not just good, He is incredible! I have seen some pretty gross things things in India, but they are massively out numbered by the beauty of this country! From sun sets, to buildings, to landscapes. I am amazed by the colours, the beauty and the technicality of God’s creation. 

2. I came to India nervous and full of anxiety, today for the first time in a really long time I woke up feeling almost peaceful. I am so thankful that I am finally overcoming fears and insecurities! I am not going to say I am 100%, but a good way there. 

3. God has blessed me with meeting people from all over the world. Before I came to India I prayed for friends to help make me feel safe. Now I feel I have friends from all over the world! From India, to Germany, England to Italy, I feel very lucky to have made such good friends.

4. I am so thankful to God for my incredible, family back home. The women I am working with have tough backgrounds and whilst they are incredibly happy and excited to learn and be with us, I constantly feel my heart break for them when they tell us about what goes on at home. God has given me so much in life and I hope and plan to continue blessing others, for I am so fortunate. I feel lucky that I have had the wonderful opportunity to see what hope teaching someone some English nouns can give a person. I will continue to pray for these women that they can break the cycle and achieve their dreams. 

5. India is incredible, thank you God for this trip 

Be blessed 

Steph 

Xoxo

P.s I can’t upload photos onto my blog from my iPad for some reason so will add photos when home 

#stephsindiaadventure #chrisitiansblog #thankfultoGod 

This one time I went to India: Volume 2 🇳🇪

I have been here now 5 days and it has been incredible, but also terrifying. 

It has been terrifying because my anxiety as taken over my body and made it really hard to really enjoy my time here. It has affected my food consumption and my happy demeanour, which on the up has got rid of the bit weight I put on round my hips, however it has also made me want to go home. This feeling does seem to be going as I settle into the program I am volunteering on. Thank you everyone who has prayed and continues to pray for my anxiety.

It has also been terrifying because of the roads! None of this organised road crossing, or politely letting people out. It is foot on the peddle and horns honked. If anyone made a sound track to India they should defiantly have horns honking! Nevertheless, I love auto rickshaw (tuck tuck) journeys, you never really know if the driver knows the way or how crazy he will drive. It’s quite exhilarating really. 

It has also been incredible.  Firstly the girls I am sharing a room with are the sweetest people and been so kind at helping me deal with my anxiety! Thank you so much Lucy, Bianca and Sanchia. The project it also wonderful. The girls and women I get to teach English to are so willing to learn to make their lives better. It is so sad when you realised how little they have as they dress in such beautiful clothes. Nevertheless, they are some of the happiest people ever and make me laugh so much! Today I did try to get them to read little Red Riding Hood and I hope they all enjoyed me reenacting a wolf. I cannot wait to continue helping them next week. 

The monuments are also incredible. I just cannot get over what I have seen. We have only been to the Lotus Temple, India gate, Akshardham (I keep calling it Askerban oops). These buildings are just breath taking. They also make me feel famous, they cannot get enough of my blonde hair and the India people just constantly want a photo with me it is funny, but also annoying. 

All in all I’m having a fantastic time. My fears are slowly being conquered, I’m being well looked after and am looking forward to continuing the adventure with a weekend visiting the Golden Triangle. 

Be Blessed

Steph

Xoxo

#india #adventure #empoweringwomen #christianblogg 

This one time I went to India, Volume 1

This photo was taken right after I had a good cry, so please forgive my red face.

Today I finally get to go to my dream destination: India. I have wanted to go here since I have been a little girl. I saw a program about it on the telly and was fascinated with the colours, the views, the people and how it seemed to change people’s lives. And finally here I am, gathering all my courage, sat in Manchester airport waiting to board my delayed plane. 

This trip has been a huge, huge venture for me. It may seem tiny to my globe trotter friends, but for a person who hasn’t been out of Europe this is a big thing for me, so please forgive me. I am terrified of traveling and being on my own, so solo travel is a huge nightmare. This year I have overcome a lot of my fears, firstly traveling through London on my own to driving across the country, I have faced things from my teenage years I did not want to deal with, I have lived on my own (be it only 3months), spoken in front of a room full of people about my faith and tried what can only be described as a rap morning prayer service. All of these things have been a step outside my comfort zone, so what’s one more thing I guess! I think this might top them all.

I am not completely traveling on my own, however.  Once I get to India I will be met by a nice person who will take me to where I will be volunteering in Delhi. This organisation has probably dealt with 100 scared visitors so I trust I will be in safe hands. 

Whilst I am in Delhi I will be volunteering with a women’s empowerment program which is part of volunteer India. Supporting women and helping them get educated to have a better life is something I am extremely passionate about. What better way to go on my solo adventure to help one of the groups of people I am passionate about helping.

This trip is going to be terrifying, I will miss home and Harry immensely, I’ll probably get diarrhoea 💩, but I cannot wait for the experience and the stories I will have because of it.

 Think of those sermon analogies.

“You know, sometimes all you need is twenty seconds of insane courage. Just literally twenty seconds of just embarrassing bravery. And I promise you, something great will come of it.”  So here's to the 20 seconds of courage I had back in March to book this!

Be Blessed,

Steph 

#india #adventure #travel #christianwomen

The emotional woman

 This post goes out to my fab housemate for introducing me to the guilty feminist and genuinely just putting up with me!

I am a feminist but… I regularly want to wear Victoria Secret model like costumes and strut down the street to feel fabulous and make everyone look at me.

I am a feminist but…I fear using power tools, because I think I am going to slice my arm off. But, I will shout at anyone who will tell me I can’t use one or offer to help. Thus, big jobs won't get done…it is not helpful.

I am a feminist and I am fed up of being treated differently.

 Now this next bit may sound a bit Emma Watson, but it is so true…

I have a great passion for gender equality. We may think our society is equal but it is not.

When I was at school I was asked if I was on steroids because I use to be able to beat the boys in races. They could not accept that I simply trained hard at the sport I competed in.

I regular hear of men who have had to deal with server mental health issues and have even committed suicide because they have found it difficult to speak out, or think it is un masculine to speak out about their feelings.

One of my closest female friends was severally bullied for being incredibly clever and good at maths, but the boys were not.

People do not believe me when I say I am training to be a vicar. The most common response is-'but your not an old man'. It is great they notice I am a woman!

We put stereotypes on what each gender should be doing, or how much they should be paid and on the way they are treated.

I am stereotyped as I am considered too emotional, because I am a woman. 

Or more precisely.

'You cry too much and your female emotions get in the way of your decisions'.

As a result of this I then I decided I was going to use all my will power not to cry in front of anyone. Realistically this decision did not last long. I'm a cryer, a messy blubbering cryer and waterproof mascara is my best friend.

The thought of me having some form of Bridget Jones sniffling breakdown may sound humorous, but in reality being told your too emotional hurt me so much. I felt a lone and like I could not ask for help, because my feelings where unnecessary, over the top or got in the way. 

After listening to the guilty feminist (which I encourage you to listen to) and many kind encouraging words from others, I realised that my emotion is a gift. Whilst I understand there is a time to cry and there is a time for everything, I want to reassure people that I can control my emotion, but when I am in a safe place and I need to let it out, I will. 

I have learn't a lot from listening to #guiltfempod that has made me feel even prouder to be me. I worry a lot about my actions, the way people respond to me, the way people talk to me or about me. The guilty feminist helped me realise that all these things I worry about are 100% normal and I am not on my own. 

I will probably always be 'too emotional', but I am learning how to control that emotion appropriately. I am glad that I can cry and feel able to speak about how I feel, because so many people cannot. I am also incredibly proud to be a woman who is surrounded by amazing women who constantly encourage me to be me. The Steph God made me to be!  

I am a feminist and a Christian and I have emotion and I do not feel I need to apologies for it! But, I probably will.

Be Blessed,

Steph

Xoxo

P.S if you ever need a good cry, I can be a shoulder to cry on, because I have cried an awful lot in my life. Thanks to everyone who as loved me through my tears!

#guiltyfeminist #feminism #emotion #christian